APRIL 27, 2024
IT'S A CELEBRATION
THERE ARE SEVERAL DIFFERENT TRADITIONS BETWEEN DANISH AND AMERICAN WEDDINGS. HERE ARE A FEW!
DENMARK
SURPRISE BACHELOR PARTY
In Denmark the bachelor party (known by the German name Polterabend, meaning "a night of lots of noise") is usually arranged as a surprise by the friends of the bride or groom.
AMERICA
BACHELOR WEEKEND
In the US, bachelorette parties are often smaller but longer. They can last a whole weekend with people flying in from all over the country.
DENMARK/AMERICA
RING FINGER
In the US, the engagement ring usually sits on the left finger of the bride, which is closer to the heart.
In Denmark diamond rings are less common, and when they are used, they sit on the right hand, with which the wedding promise is given.
AMERICA
REHERSAL DINNER
In the US it is common to have a small dinner the night before the wedding, so the two families can talk about the party the next day.
AMERICA
CEREMONY BY A FRIEND
In American wedding ceremonies are usually "officiated" by a friend or family member of the bride and groom, ordained at the "Universal Life Church" online.
DENMARK
CEREMONY BY THE MAYOR
In Denmark it is most common to get married in a church or at the townhall. But many mayors also offer to come to the party to do the ceremony there.
AMERICA
CEREMONY VOWS
In American wedding ceremonies, couples typically exchange personalized vows of things they promise to do for each other once married.
DENMARK
SHAKING HANDS
While American ceremonies end with a kiss, Danish ceremonies end by the bride and groom shaking hands. This symbolizes equality, consent, and the promise to uphold the vows.
DURING THE PARTY
DENMARK
RECEPTION
A confusing word. In Denmark, a reception is usually a party after the ceremony, but before the dinner. In the US, this is more commonly known as the "Cocktail Hour".
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Cake cutting typically happens during this time at Danish weddings.
AMERICA
RECEPTION
In America, the reception generally means all the events of the wedding night besides the ceremony. Receptions in America tend to end around 10-11pm, sometimes with an "After Party" at a bar afterwards.
DENMARK
HANDSHAKE GREETINGS
In Denmark, it's common for guests to shake the hands of each wedding guest upon arrival, often creating a sort of line of handshaking. At the end of the night, it's also common for danes to shake the hands of each guest before leaving. You don't have to do this at our wedding, it's fine to "Irish Goodbye" so we can keep the party going! (The "handshake line" can sometimes give people the idea to leave and we want you to stay and dance!)
DENMARK
DRESS LENGTH
At some danish weddings, danish women want to make sure their dress is not longer than the bride's, so they like to know if the bride is wearing a long or short dress. In this case Amy will be wearing a long dress.
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DENMARK
TABLE SEATING
At danish weddings, it's common for married couples to be split up at different tables since they already talk to each other all the time :)
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You'll have to wait and see what we choose for the seating arrangements for our wedding!
DENMARK/AMERICA
GIFTS
At American weddings, it is common for guests to ship gifts directly to the bride and groom from an online gift registry or to give money through an online honeymoon fund. This means fewer physical presents are brought to the wedding.
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In Denmark, physical presents are more commonly brought to the wedding. There is usually a "gift master," (a family member or friend of the bride and groom) that takes care of opening and categorizing them.
DENMARK
SPEECHES, SONGS AND GAMES
Dinners at Danish weddings take a long time because they are interspersed with lots of speeches, songs, and games contributed by the guests.
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A dedicated "Toastmaster" is responsible for planning and organizing the entertainment, what Americans would call an "MC."
See the "DETAILS" section for how you can contribute!
AMERICA
BOUQUET TOSS
In the US, the bride tosses her bouquet to unmarried women.
DENMARK/AMERICA
CAKE CUTTING
In America the wedding cake is usually the dessert of the dinner.
After cutting the cake, the couple saves a slice of the cake in the freezer for a year later.
DENMARK
KISSING THE BRIDE AND GROOM
When the groom leaves the room, all the men line up to kiss the bride (on the cheek.)
Similarly, if the bride leaves the room, the women line up to kiss the groom.
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Don't be scared, but be sure to get your kiss in before the bride/groom returns.
DENMARK
SKÅLMEDEY
A good wedding will have a lot of cheers-ing (or in Danish, skål!) Sometimes it can be nice to turn the cheers-ing into a song.
A common refrain goes "Hurra, hurra, den skål, den var bra". English translation: "Hurray, hurray, that toast, it was great".
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See below for more common toast songs.
DENMARK
KISSING ON THE CHAIRS
The guests may tap their plates and glasses, and the bride and groom will stand up on their chairs and kiss.
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Similarly the guests may stump their feet, and the bride and groom will crawl under the table.
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Please just don't do it too much.
AFTER THE DINNER
DENMARK
WEDDING WALTZ
In Denmark, the bride and groom must dance a wedding waltz before midnight.
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We hope many of you will check out the waltz steps below, so you can join us!
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At the end of the waltz, a surprise awaits the groom. Symbolizing the end of his bachelorhood.
AMERICA
FATHER & DAUGHTER DANCE
The Americans have a number of "special dances". The first of these is between the bride and her father. In modern times, this is followed by a dance by the groom and his mom.
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Another common dance is the "who has been married longer" dance.
DENMARK
LATE NIGHT PARTY
While American weddings often end before midnight, Danish parties last all night, or in our case to 2am.
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To keep the party going there will be late night snacks, an open bar, and maybe some extra games.
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But make sure to adjust your sleep schedule in advance!
AMERICA
STRAIGHT TO HONEY MOON
In America, the bride and groom will typically go on a vacation shortly after the wedding to celebrate getting married, known as the Honey Moon.
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In our case we'll do a small vacation after the party, and then a longer one later on.
SKÅL MEDLEYS
WALTZ STEPS
DANISH MEDLEY
Hun skal leve, hun skal leve,
hun skal leve højt hurra!
Hurra, hurra, den skål, den var bra
Hurra, hurra, den skål, den var bra
Han skal leve, han skal leve,
han skal leve højt hurra!
Ja gid at det må gå ham godt,
og gå ham godt, og gå ham godt.
Ja gid at det må gå ham godt
i mange mange år
i mange mange år
For hun er så ung
og så yndig ser hun ud.
For hun er så ung
og så yndig ser hun ud.
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For han er en af vor egne
Ja han er en af vor egne
Ja han er en af vor egen
En rigtig guttermand
En rigtig guttermand
En rigtig guttermand
For han er en af vor egne
En rigtig guttermand
Hun skal leve, hun skal leve,
hun skal leve højt hurra!!!!
ENGLISH TRANSLATION
She shall live, she shall live,
she shall live high hurrah!
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Hurray, hurray, that toast, it was great.
Hurray, hurray, that toast, it was great.
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He shall live, he shall live,
he shall live high hurrah!
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Yes may fortune be his,
be his, be his,
Yes may fortune be his
for many, many years,
for many, many years.
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For she is so young
and she looks so charming.
For she is so young
and she looks so charming.
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For he's one of our own,
Yes, he's one of our own,
Yes, he's one of our own,
A true gentleman,
A true gentleman,
A true gentleman,
For he's one of our own,
A true gentleman.
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She shall live, she shall live,
she shall live high hurrah!!!!"
